Personal hygiene

12 July 2009

Shopping for deodorant is a metaphor for my life.

First off, I'm out, and though I believe I could live quite happily and independently without deodorant, I feel the social pressure to get some of my very own. Also, it's comforting to know you smell good.

So I went to the store yesterday to look around, scope out my options, weigh the opportunity costs.

Eight rows of sticks and sticks of antiperspirant: roll-on, gel-on, 24/7, night time, black-safe, unscented, tropical spice-- there seem to be an inordinate number of choices, but they all break down into three types:

There's the friendly kind, the kind you always get, the one that smells neutral and doesn't make a mess, and because you always get it, you know you can confidently expect it to work 50% of the time. Not a high percentage, but it's the confidence here that's key.

Then there's the expensive new brand, that exotic, mysterious smelling New Formula with a sparkly package and marketing promises that may in fact change the course of your whole thus-far-lack-luster life.

And then there's the very safe and very reliable, unscented brand that is plain and boring and one of a kind (because only one brand was crazy enough to try to market a deodorant that doesn't smell Powder Fresh and doesn't have a catchy slogan, and doesn't wear a packaged like an ice cream bar)

And of course I had to smell them all. I nixed the fruit scented ones right off (I'd rather not develop a Pavlovian connection with the smell of my sweat and watermelon), and the baby-powder ones we're too old-ladyish for me. Turns out the "Rosepetal" smelled more like toilet bowl cleaner, and I just couldn't imagine putting "Sexy Intrigue" in my arm pits.

I finally just grabbed one of my 4 or 5 tried-and-half-true regulars-- they smelled and looked just the same as always, safe- and half- reliable, but as I turned to go, I couldn't pull myself away from the All NEW! sparkle of something different and more exciting.

The safe unscented sat bland and undisturbed on the edge of the shelf.

And I stood, weighing my options, confused, and a little frustrated. Did I want to pay that much for the new, alluring, untried brand? Did I really want to stick with the same-old-same-old that I knew wasn't really what I wanted? Maybe I really was better off al natural.

I pulled the unscented, reliable stick off the shelf, grabbed a chocolate bar, and check out.

I tired it this morning, with low expectations. Turns out this one actually scented, a sweet and refreshing smell like the clean outdoors or early morning dew. That was a pleasant surprise. I think I may have found a new favorite.